Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
