I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
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