my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize