is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
my shit smells like andre
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
