Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
I need moral support for this bender
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Randomize
