Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize
