what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
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