Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
