could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
