i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
These Dirty People Haven’t Told Their SO About Their Kinky Fetish
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
This is Why People Stop Sex Halfway Through
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life