It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
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