I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
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