More tranny stories later!
I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
