hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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