actually, I'm a sock model
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
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