yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
