if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
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