she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Bring me that man meat
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
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