Already got asked if we're dating
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
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He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
I won't be able to make it. Too hung over. Can't hold down fluids. I'm in the bathtub trying to hydrate my body through osmosis. And yes, Tequila Tuesday is totally still on for tonight.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
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The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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