I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
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