So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Randomize