yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
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