you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
