were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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