This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
What part of “the stripper has a gun, we need to leave” is confusing you? She’s drunk, she’s fucking crazy and NOW SHE’S PACKING HEAT!
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