You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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