she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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