someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
