i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
