it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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