It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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