do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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