Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize