apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
