Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Hello my rib-scented angel!
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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