I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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