so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
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