just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
I forgot how hot balto sounded
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize
