he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
Randomize
