you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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