He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
