At least make sure they are 18
Why
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize