hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
