I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
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