i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
That means I have to put pants on. That is not something I am willing to do right now.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
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