I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
Having a random hookup so left but love u
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
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