Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
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