Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
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