South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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