Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
