fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
Randomize
